On being happy.

My mom sent me a cd a while back and there was a song on it called Happy Baby, by Shaye. It struck a chord with me.

Since I've lived on my own in Japan I've finally stopped looking for what will make me happy, and I live in the moment instead. I never did that before. I was always searching for something I didn't have. I dont' feel the need to do that now. I'm HAPPY! The happiest I've ever been.

My happiness comes from finally making choices for myself, being healthly, having amazing friends and understanding family, and just enough money to eat, and keep my car on the road. Anything after that is just gravy.

Yes, I still go after things I want (travel, sports gear, new hair color) but I know they are not what will define my happiness. It's the idea that I can actually choose to go after these things if I want to -it's the choice that leaves me content.

So, if this is it for me, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore.

Here are the lyrics:

Standing in line at the grocery store
Reading magazines that say i should want more
There's an old boyfriend, he looks my way
I can't help but smile, I feel great today
Last night's clothes, no make-up, drinking my coffee from a paper cup

If this is it for me baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore
For what will make me happy baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore
Anymore

So many places I'll never see
But here and now is where I'd rather be
Too many people searching so hard
But they never look right in their backyard
I've made mistakes, that's for sure, ain't that what your life is for?

If this is it for me baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore
For what will make me happy baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore

(More clothes, more cash, more things, more rings)
These lines upon my face, I'd be a fool to erase cause they show my place in this world

If this is it for me baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore
For what will make me happy baby, that's just fine, I'm not looking anymore